Why Study This Mantra...You will learn how to emphasize relationships in your life, tend to them in a conscious way, and cultivate a strong foundation to them. This will surely pay back in kind!
– Turkish Proverb
Having really meaningful and fulfilling relationships is at the top of the list of key elements to a happy life. Being in relationships where you're valued for who you are intrinsically leads to a feeling of belonging, says Emily Esfahani Smith, author of The Power of Meaning.
This month, you'll focus on them. You'll learn some great practices for focusing on and strengthening the most important relationships in your life.
Today's affirmation: "I appreciate and cherish the most important relationships in my life, and I'm willing to work so they know this."
As I put on this mantra this morning, I will choose a person to deepen my relationship with; my significant other, my child, my good friend. I can pick the same person as yesterday, but I will try to switch it up as well.
I will choose a language of love to focus on today to deepen my relationship with them:
- Words of affirmation
- Little acts of service
- Giving gifts
- Spending quality time with them
- Physical touch
If the person is my significant other, I will keep pursuing them each day, no matter how familiar they become.
This month, you have 3 options for your monthly challenge! Read through them all, then choose the one which you feel will be most helpful for you and your relationship.
Option 1: Feel Connected Exercise
- Make a list of the people who offer you comfort or security. If it's helpful, consider:
- Who is the person you most like to spend time with?
- Who is the person it is hardest to be away from?
- Who is the person you want to talk to when you are worried about something?
- Who is the person you turn to when you are feeling down?
- Who is the person you know will always be there for you?
- Who is the person you want to share your successes with? (Some of these might be the same person, of course.)
- Write down six positive qualities that are common to some or all of these people—qualities that they strongly embody.
- Next, recall and visualize a specific situation when you were feeling distressed or worried, and one of these people comforted and helped you.
- Write a brief description of that situation and the way you felt during it.
Option 2: 36 Questions
Identify someone with whom you’d like to become closer. This is useful for anyone you want to feel close to, including family members, friends, and acquaintances. Before trying it, make sure both you and your partner are comfortable with sharing personal thoughts and feelings with each other.
Find a time when you and your partner have at least 45 minutes free and are able to meet in person. Take turns asking one another the questions. Each person should answer each question, but in an alternating order, so that a different person goes first each time.
Take 15 minutes on Set 1, 15 minutes on Set 2, and 15 minutes on Set 3.
Option 3: The Strengths Date
Each of you identify your own personal strengths using the Strengths Identification Test. Then set out to define together a perfect evening that lets both people use their strength.
As I remove my mantra tonight, I will take 3-5 minutes and think about the day's chosen person:
- How did I show them love?
- How did I receive love?